Lateefah Fatunbi and Praise Oladoyin

Don’t underestimate the stages of grief and the importance of letting yourself feel all of them.
Grief is a multifaceted response to loss, particularly to the loss of someone or something that has died, to which a bond or affection was formed.
Different people grief in different ways.

  • Take care of yourself physically. Grief can take its toll on a person’s physical well-being. It’s important to do your best to get adequate rest and eat.
  • Forgive. As you think about your relationship with your loved one and bring to mind areas of hurt or regret, give yourself permission to forgive. This isn’t easy, but it’s an important step in moving forward. If the hurts you carry are deep and difficult to forgive, seek professional help.
  • Explore your spirituality. Losing a special person can deepen and strengthen your spiritual life. Nourish yourself spiritually in whatever way works best for you-—prayer, song, worship, meditation, or study of scripture. Ask questions, and then allow yourself to be open to the inner guidance you receive. Listen to the whispers of your heart and soul.
  • “Talk” with the person you lost.
  • Write letters. The key is to allow yourself to say what’s on your mind and in your heart.
  • Treasure fond memories. There are several ways in which you may want to treasure fond memories of your special person.
  • Take time with your special person’s personal belongings. You need not sort through your special person’s personal belongings right away.
  • Honor your special person. Think of something you would like to do that would be significant or meaningful to your special person. Whatever you choose to do, make it something that will help you celebrate your special person’s life and memory.
  • Work through your grief. The only way out of your grief is through it. Try to accept your feelings, whatever they may be. Grief is a natural process, nature’s way of bringing us to acceptance, healing and peace.
  • Share your pain and hope with others. Give your grief words, and find at least one person you trust and respect with whom you can comfortably share your emotions.
  • Let yourself cry. Sobbing promotes relaxation and the release of tension and sorrow. Tears are nature’s ways of cleansing and healing. Crying is a gift; allow yourself to receive it.