Why I Hate Valentine’s Day

Why I Hate Valentine’s Day

Kameron Duncan, Staff Writer

4 Reasons why this “holiday” is a mockery
There are a few things that I personally can’t stand about Valentine’s Day.
Valentimes? Not on my time
First and foremost, I hate the sheer mispronunciation of the holiday. On no official cards, brochures, candy hearts, or caricatures of overweight babies with bows and arrows does it say “Valentimes Day.” It hurts my soul, and quite frankly the institution of proper English to hear people say it. The worst part is that people actually believe that they’re right about it too.
I Don’t Even Know You!
Second on my list of pet peeves is the need for every person you breathe towards to request that you give them a card. People I’ve only passed in the hallway will come up to me and ask me why I haven’t spent what equates to a mortgage on chocolates, cards with cartoon characters on them, and tacky stuffed animals that can be made into hearts with cheesy sayings on them. If you must give gifts on this mind-numbingly asinine day, you should only have to do it for the people in your life who can tell you whether or not you look bad in a dress.
Absolutely Ridiculous
Next up is a school related problem that also extends to birthday territory as well. Unless your name is Drew Carey and you’re on The Price is Right, there is no need to gift-wrap your locker. This is one of those things where not only is the execution flawed, so is the idea, the premise, the thought, and the wrapping paper itself. People are using the worst possible wrapping paper to do it with (I’ve actually seen a Cupid character with a Mohawk and leather chaps sliding on his knees with a bow/guitar combo. Yeah.)
Shame isn’t strong enough a word
My final and largest problem with Valentine’s Day is the sight of couples in “love”.  Now you may be asking yourself, “Well isn’t that mean of you?” No, it’s not, and I’ll tell you why. If you got into a relationship on January 24th, and you’re in love on February 14th, you need to be banned from the institution of relationships for a while because it’s clear you don’t understand how these things work out. I can’t tell you how many people on Facebook and Twitter have made statuses about how “in love” they are with their significant other on February 13th, only to take approximately 90000 photos (and tag me in them) the next day, and break up on the 15th.